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Bignosebird

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Bush-Witze
« am: 05.08.2003, 14:36 Uhr »
Wer hat noch welche ?
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

"THE QUEEN'S IQ TEST"

While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea
with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership
philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself
with intelligent people.

He asks how she knows if they're intelligent. "I do so
by asking them the right questions," says the Queen.
"Allow me to demonstrate." She phones Tony Blair and
says, "Mr. Prime Minister. Please answer this
question:

"Your mother has a child, and your father has a child,
and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is
it?" Tony Blair responds, "It's me, Your Majesty."

"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the
Queen. She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr.
Bush?" "Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be
using that!"

Upon returning to Washington, he decides he'd better
put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations
Committee to the test. He summons Jesse Helms to the
White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you
can answer a question for me."

"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?" "Uhh, your
mother has a child, and your father has a child, and
this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is
it?" Helms hems and haws and finally asks, "Can I
think about it and get back to you?" Bush agrees, and
Helms leaves.

Helms immediately calls a meeting of other senior
Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question
for several hours, but nobody can come up with an
answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin
Powell at the State Department and explains his
problem.

"Now lookee here, son, your mother has a child, and
your father has a child, and this child is not your
brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course, you dumb cracker."

Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House
and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it
is! It's Colin Powell!"

And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, it's Tony Blair "
grün-goldene Grüsse BigNoseBird
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Alex

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Re: Bush-Witze
« Antwort #1 am: 05.08.2003, 19:21 Uhr »
Der Witz ist zwar alt und kursiert mit vielen verschiedenen Personen, aber er bringt einen doch immer wieder zum schmunzeln....

Alex
Take me out to the ballgame...

Eindrücke aus Nordamerika
 - viel Spaß dabei -


GKeipinger

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Re: Bush-Witze
« Antwort #2 am: 05.08.2003, 23:01 Uhr »
Ist der auch alt?

We take you now to the Oval Office.

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Lay it on me.
Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.
George: That's what I want to know.
Condi: That's what I'm telling you.
George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes.
George: I mean the fellow's name.
Condi: Hu.
George: The guy in China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The new leader of China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The Chinaman!
Condi: Hu is leading China.
George: Now whaddya' asking me for?
Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.
George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?
Condi: That's the man's name.
George: That's who's name?
Condi: Yes.
George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.
Condi: That's correct.
George: Then who is in China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Then who is?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Condi: Kofi?
George: No, thanks.
Condi: You want Kofi?
George: No.
Condi: You don't want Kofi.
George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi?
George: Milk! Will you please make the call?
Condi: And call who?
George: Who is the guy at the U.N?
Condi: Hu is the guy in China.
George: Will you stay out of China?!
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi.
George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.
(Condi picks up the phone.)
Condi: Rice, here.
George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?

Mfg   Günter

Navajo

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Re: Bush-Witze
« Antwort #3 am: 05.08.2003, 23:19 Uhr »
Es gibt da eine Seite, die sich nur mit dem Äußeren von George Bush, genauer gesagt seiner Ähnlichkeit mit einem Schimpansen, befaßt. Seltsamerweise werden alle hochgeladenen Bilder regelmäßig wie von Geisterhand wieder gelöscht, guckst Du hier: http://www.bushorchimp.com/pics.html - nur Kreuze!

Zum Glück gibt's aber noch DIESE Seite!

GKeipinger

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Re: Bush-Witze
« Antwort #4 am: 05.08.2003, 23:43 Uhr »
Kennt ihr die politische "SENDUNG MIT DER MAUS"?

Aber Vorsicht. Alle ,die in diesem Forum meinen, dass Politik hier nichts zu suchen hat, sollten nicht anklicken.

Mfg   Günter

Alex

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Re: Bush-Witze
« Antwort #5 am: 06.08.2003, 20:52 Uhr »
Hi Guenther

der Witz von dir stand mit einigen anderen mal im Stern, unter dem Motto: was zur Zeit im Internet in Sachen George W. kursiert.

Alex
Take me out to the ballgame...

Eindrücke aus Nordamerika
 - viel Spaß dabei -


Scooby Doo

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Re: Bush-Witze
« Antwort #6 am: 11.08.2003, 12:38 Uhr »
Ich will euch nicht die Freude an der Sache nehmen, aber der Queen-Witz und der "new man in China" wurden schon mal unter "Mal was Lustiges" veröffentlicht.
Viele Grüße, Markus

http://www.historic-route66.de

Harhir

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Re: Bush-Witze
« Antwort #7 am: 11.08.2003, 17:19 Uhr »
Mehr Bush Bilder gibt es auch hier:
http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blbushpictures.htm?once=true&

Uns absolut klasse ist:
http://www.whitehouse.org/
(sieht fast echt aus, gelle??)

So long
Stefan